||Issue No. 252||18 February 2005|
Wood for the Trees
Economics: Super Seduction
Interview: Bono and Me
Unions: The Eight Hour Day and the Holy Spirit
Technology: From Widgets to Digits
Education: Dumb and Dumber
Health: No Place for the Young
History: The Work-In That Changed a Nation
Review: Dare to Win
Poetry: Labor's Dreaming
The Locker Room
But Then Again
Lack Of Interest
Just when we all thought that the bottom of the barrel had been well and truly scraped it turns out that there are lies, damned lies and reasons for interest rates to rise.
The latest bit of fuzzy logic comes from the caring sharing boss of the bosses' union, Heather Ridout, with her wacky claim that providing menstrual leave will lead to interest rate rises.
Just why this is so is not immediately clear, but it has something to do with smoke and mirrors and the idea that if you say something often enough everyone will believe you.
It may well be true that if we pay workers in salt and give them a hessian rug to sleep on then interest rates will remain low, in which case Ridout is a visionary and her subtle logic is to be applauded.
One thing we do know is that interest rates rise because the Reserve Bank Board decides they should rise, and that the Reserve Bank Board meets once a month - which brings a whole new meaning to that term 'that time of the month'.
The situation where people are having to dig into their sick leave because of something that is a natural part of life is bad enough, but now we have this contribution from the intellectual giant of the employing classes that, if it doesn't trivialise the issue, certainly sends it off in a unique trajectory.
Whatever planet Heather is on is an interesting one. No doubt it's a place where units of production, sometimes erroneously referred to as human beings, march stridently on from puberty straight into menopause, pausing only to sing the company song.
We dare not let our humanity get in the way of profit, that would put a bit of a crimp into the lives of those godlike beings that adorn the boards of our publicly listed companies.
A wry joke used to do the rounds that if men had periods then there'd be four paid sick days a month for the purpose.
Now, when someone actually starts to address the issue, it becomes fodder for this bizarre campaign to link treating people like human beings as being responsible for interest rate rises.
Our Tool Of The Week will be gibbering about interest rates going to rise like a cross between a Dalek and Chicken Little at the first sign of any compassion being shown to the Australian worker.
She understands the pressures facing Australian families in much the same way as a goldfish understands Euclidian geometry.
It'd be easy to say that Heather Ridout is contributing to a low standard of debate about workplace 'reform', but there is no debate.
Instead we are treated to these ideological carpetbaggers giving fulsome explanations about how they are going to take to working Australia in much the same way as Attilla the Hun took to central Europe.
Heather Ridout will be one of those rolling the bodies over and pocketing anything shiny.
They'd be more honest if they just turned up on your doorstep with a balaclava and a sawn-off shotgun.
|Search All Issues | Latest Issue | Previous Issues | Print Latest Issue|
© 1999-2002 Workers Online