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October 2005   
F E A T U R E S

Interview: Under Fire
Michael Crosby outlines his agenda to save the movement � and explains why Australians have nothing to fear from the SEIU.

Politics: And the Winners Are ...
Wal King, Allan Moss, Roger Corbett, Chip Goodyear, Michael Chaney and David Murray have lots in common, writes Jim Marr.

Industrial: Un-Australian
Labour lawyer Clive Thompson argues the changes to IR are fundamentally at odds with the national tradition of consesensus.

Economics: The Common Wealth
As the policy wonks debate the future of our cities, Neale Towart mounts a simple argument: It�s the real people in a society, stupid

History: Walking for Justice
The Eight Hour Day, a very Australian celebration, had its origins in New Zealand it seems, writes Neale Towart.

International: Deja Vu
A group of trade unions have walked away from America's peak council, again. Labourstart's Eric Lee was there.

Legal: The Rights Stuff
Terror laws have sparked a fresh debate on a Bill of Rights - and workers have a bigger stake than ever before, writes Rachael Osman-Chin.

Review: That Cinderella Fella
Russell trades the phone for mitts in an inspiring cinematic slug-fest. Nathan Brown is ringside

Poetry: Is Howard Kidding?
Mel Cheal asks who Howard thinks he is kidding to the tune of the �Dad�s Army� theme song.

C O L U M N S

The Soapbox
No Place For A Woman!
Doreen Borrow spoke to the Public Service Association�s women�s conference in September about her experiences of working life that span seven decades.

Postcard
North By Northwest
Phil Doyle returns from up north, where he survived on nothing but goodwill, good people and a great big orange bus.

The Locker Room
Disaster
In which Whatsisname slams the recent poor form of Thingummyjig.

Parliament
The Westie Wing
Our favourite MP, Ian West MLC, gets all casual in his latest missive from the Bear Pit.

E D I T O R I A L

Age of Consent
After more than five years of debating, cajoling and at times pleading, NSW workers have secured a set of cyber work rights worth celebrating.

N E W S

 Secret Policemen's Balls-Up

 Centrelink Breaches Cyber Law

 Examiner Pulps Cadet

 Food Truck Flattens Woman

 Will They Know It's Christmas?

 Death By Nestle

 Taskforce On Safety Charges

 Archbishop Preaches End Of Civilisation

 Union Drives Tassie Train

 PM Cold on Lunch Date

 Seafarers Scupper Sell Off

 Fraser Terror-fied

 Tribute to HT Lee

 Activist's What's On!

L E T T E R S
 Rat�s Army
 Kev's Confusion
 Make Ads Not Law
 Nice One, Workers!
 Dog Eat Dog
WHAT YOU CAN DO
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The Locker Room

Disaster


In which Whatsisname slams the recent poor form of Thingummyjig.

In the immediate past certain synergies have been established that have allowed numerous stakeholders to rise to new challenges and embrace change in a manner that allows mappable positives to be accomplished within designated guidelines through tested goal setting strategies, building cohesiveness, team strengths and enhanced outcomes for leadership roles.

How good were South!

And the Balmain Magpies!

I don't know what was best; Kirk's don't argue in the second quarter, or a big bloke with a beard doing what Noel Cleal does to pigs the following week.

All good stuff; the only people left crying into their beers were Bookmakers, especially after one punter was reported to have got the double, turning $770 lazy dollars into enough to start his own space program.

But there's no need for us to feel sorry for the Bookmakers, the thing only thing that can do that is the TAB Tote.

The Locker Room witnessed a race last month where a winner paid $12.90, and the quinella $8.40. This is as wrong as yellow socks.

But even that isn't as stupid as this column's idle boast that the Swans without a ruckman would be not dissimilar to the performance of the Office of National Assessments in the last four thousand years - messy, incompetent and doomed to failure.

Certainly, it displayed the sort of judgement that would preclude this column from playing for the Bloods given their No Dickheads policy.

Which isn't a worry, for it shall also encompass Latent Hewitt. For years it was thought he was Dorothy's son, but now I realise he was just her friend.

Many people believe that Sydney came north because, as the song says, "Cheer, cheer the Red and the White, move up to Sydney if money gets tight...".

But the truth is far more calculating.

It was the sort of fiendish plot that could only be hatched in the laneways and back streets of Emerald Hill, later known as South Melbourne. One steeped in the underworld so favoured by Crawford television dramas and Bob Hawke's Machiavellian tilt at the ACTU leadership.

I have it on good authority, supplied first hand in a Hotel in Swan Street Richmond, that South Melbourne went north to tap into the Taronga Zoo chimpanzee breeding program and produce another Bobby Skilton.

No wonder the Willesee lad wanted to buy Sydney, his dad must've owned South Fremantle. If you doubt me check the record of both Willesee the Whitlam Cabinet minister, and the South Fremantle football club. I'm onto Mike, and his idiot brother Terry.

Alas, the experiment didn't work. It produced a number of chimps, some who continue to play in the Riverina League and the much-underrated spectacle of the Sapphire Coast League, but none who had such incredible skills off both sides of the body.

But it was the heart of South that saw that the answer lay, not with settling for a chimp, but going for the whole 900 pound gorilla, and they got Barry Hall.

And Sydney fell in love with that gorilla in the same way they fell in love with investment property speculation.

There is a lot of similarities between a 900 pound gorilla and the Sydney property market. A lot more than you'd think.

And speaking of investment speculation, the Supertest set down for this month must have seemed a good idea at the time.

Umpire Darryl Hair will be standing when Mutiah Murilitheran plays for the best cricketers in the world outside the Australian Cricket Team. Will Daz call him for chucking again?

The sides are too good for this to be a drawn out affair. Unless the weather intervenes it should be over inside four days.

And hasn't the weather been strange lately?

Phil Doyle - settling in behind the leaders after the first furlong


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