
Issue No 97		25 May 2001

LaborNET	Ask Neale	Tool of the Week

Satire

HIH Recovers Own Losses

Extracted from The Chser

The collapsed insurance company HIH has lodged a claim with another insurer to be reimbursed for its $4 billion loss.


	The Chaser

HIH directors revealed yesterday that they had insured themselves with someone else when they realised their own insurance business was useless. The claim will ensure that the directors of the company can continue to be handsomely rewarded for their negligent management of HIH. It will also ensure that HIH can continue to run its core business of throwing lavish staff parties.

"We're not completely stupid," said one director from an unidentified island in the Pacific. "We've been in the insurance game long enough to know that if anyone needed insurance we did."

The director said the thousands of Australian families and companies who have been affected by the collapse only have themselves to blame, after they refused to buy Insurer Insurance which would have protected them against insurance loss.

Former directors of HIH have also rushed to defend their decision not to appoint a voluntary administrator.

"We never thought anyone would be stupid enough to volunteer to manage this company," said former CEO Ray Williams. "I mean, I never managed it and I was being paid a shit load."

The HIH collapse will be the subject of an inquiry by the Australian Securities and Investments Commission, which indirectly helped cause the disaster. Its chairman David Knott denies a conflict of interest.

Another inquiry will be conducted by the Australian Prudential Regulation Authority, which also helped cause the disaster. Its director David Knott again denies a conflict of interest and has even been kind enough to offer his time to head up a Royal Commission into the affair.

The insurance company's auditors, Arthur Andersen, insist that conflict of interest has never had a place in the HIH boardroom, which the auditors regularly visit as HIH directors and where they happily signed off on the health of the company's finances.

Prime Minister John Howard was initially reluctant to offer Federal Government assistance to HIH because, despite its impressive levels of financial mismanagement, the Prime Minister's brother Stan Howard was not on the HIH board. Mr Howard eventually agreed however to offer a substantial relief package to HIH customers, as his own personal insurance against any further seat losses in the upcoming election.

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  Issue 97 contents

Interview: The Big Bribe
ACTU president Sharan Burrow emerges from the Federal Budget lock-up to ask where is the Howard Government�s vision for the future?

Compo: Where To Now?
As the dust settles in the WorkCover war, we look at what's been achieved and what still needs to be resolved.

Unions: The Real Big Brother
Have you ever got the feeling someone is watching you? If you work in one of the 4000 Call Centres in Australia then you�re probably right.

International: The Not-So Shakey Isles
NZ Council of Trade Union secretary Paul Goulter looks at life for the workers under a Labour Government.

Corporate: BHP: The Bit Australian
The BHP Billiton merger was an act of corporate tyranny. And, as Zoe Reynolds report, humanity does not figure on a corporate balance sheet.

History: A Proud Tradition of Mediocrity
Budgets always generate hype and a media circus, especially in the lead up to elections. This one is no exception and the Coalition consistency in panic and lack of ideas is reassuring in its lack of ideas.

Review: Ideologically Sound
Mark Hebblewhite trawls through the CD rack to dispel the notion that there's no politics left in pop.

Satire: HIH Recovers Own Losses
The collapsed insurance company HIH has lodged a claim with another insurer to be reimbursed for its $4 billion loss.

» Spotlight on HIH�s WorkCover Link

» Construction Industry Faces Safety Crisis

» Statewide Strike Off But Della on Notice

» David and Goliath Battle at IBM

» Natasha�s Democrats Face Senate IR Test

» Howard Abandons Working Families

» City Councils Recognise Birth � Now for the Bush

» BHP Forced to Back Off Kembla AWAs

» Impulse Bores Workers Into Submission

» Coach Drivers Win Permanency

» Boss Pockets Compo Payment

» Union Wins Battle in AWA War

» Publicans Want to Reduce Bar Pay

» Abbott Agrees to Ban Asbestos

» Union Acts to Save Leichhardt Refuge

» Trade Union Choir Turns Ten

» Activists' Notebook

» The Soapbox

» The Locker Room

» Trades Hall

» Tool Shed

» Thanks from Indonesia

» Hester Spot On

» Fuelling Voter Anger

» May Day - The Debate Continues

» Not a Chaser Fan

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