Issue No 97 | 25 May 2001 | |
Tool ShedPeter Does Dallas
Who says the Liberals resist engagement with Asia? 'Here's 300 bucks - now vote for me.' The Walking Smirk's pork barrelling budget would have done Joseph Estrada proud. This week confirmed the obvious. The Coalition is a party that only feels its own pain. Having spent the last few years screwing the old, the young, the infirm, small business and the bush, (screwing workers is a given with these class warriors) the Libs saviour in waiting El Caudillo Costello tried to persuade us this week that the last five years was just a dream. You know a party is in desperate straits when their strategists start looking at re-runs of Dallas for ideas to extract themselves from the poo. At this point a brief recount for the young and for telephobes of one of the great pieces of popular culture that has proved to be influential in politics from the current White House and now even deep into the Australian Liberal establishment. Dallas was the classic soap that brought the great Texan virtues of malice, treachery, self-interest, narcissism, callousness, and deceit - pretty well the ideology that underpins the White House these days - to the wider world. It's greatest plot line - up there with anything from Lewis Carroll or any of the Latin American magical realists - was the resurrection of Bobby Ewing. Nice Guy Bobby gets wasted and written out of the show. For two years the ratings plunge. Producers have a great idea. Bobby startles and wakes in the shower - the last two years have just been a dream for cast and audience alike! That's the preamble to this year's budget!! Caudillo Costello's first budget in 1996 slashed ATSIC's funding, ridiculed training and trashed programs for the unemployed, screwed older workers and wasted the 'earnings credit' for those on benefits. Or did it? 'Wake up bozo it was all a bad dream,' now say the Libs. 'All those things are there. Just pinch yourself and have a look.' The budget had other feel goody features such as a health package that targets alcoholism and mental health - definite growth areas under the Libs through their political version of want creation. 'We feel the pain, ours that is, and it's time for compassion. For us,' they really say. How dumb do they think we all are? Take this little gem from Costello: '(The budget) is directed at a strong economy and a just society from a prudent government.' Go Goebbels you good thing! You can imagine The Smirk warming up in the Libs dressing shed before delivering the budget. It would be like watching Kevin Kline, the sociopath in A Fish Called Wanda. 'I'm sssssss. I'm ssssssssooooo. I'm sssssooooooorr. I'm ssssssooooorrrrry Australia.' And they think we're going to swallow it. Even Shane Stone, a creature of the Northern Territory's Country Liberal Party -not exactly a cradle of compassionate conservatism - thinks Costello is mean, tricky, out of touch and incapable of listening. Roll on the election. Let's send the Libs, like Bobby, back to the grave.
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Interview: The Big Bribe ACTU president Sharan Burrow emerges from the Federal Budget lock-up to ask where is the Howard Government�s vision for the future? Compo: Where To Now? As the dust settles in the WorkCover war, we look at what's been achieved and what still needs to be resolved. Unions: The Real Big Brother Have you ever got the feeling someone is watching you? If you work in one of the 4000 Call Centres in Australia then you�re probably right. International: The Not-So Shakey Isles NZ Council of Trade Union secretary Paul Goulter looks at life for the workers under a Labour Government. Corporate: BHP: The Bit Australian The BHP Billiton merger was an act of corporate tyranny. And, as Zoe Reynolds report, humanity does not figure on a corporate balance sheet. History: A Proud Tradition of Mediocrity Budgets always generate hype and a media circus, especially in the lead up to elections. This one is no exception and the Coalition consistency in panic and lack of ideas is reassuring in its lack of ideas. Review: Ideologically Sound Mark Hebblewhite trawls through the CD rack to dispel the notion that there's no politics left in pop. Satire: HIH Recovers Own Losses The collapsed insurance company HIH has lodged a claim with another insurer to be reimbursed for its $4 billion loss.
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