
Issue No 69		01 September 2000

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Sport

The Unthinkable Versus The Unpalatable

By Terry O'Brien

The Grand Final from hell has given Terry O'Brien the September Blues.

The season draws to an end. That One Day in September is a week away. And I have to find a reason to get excited about it. Last week's games had four of the teams I hate most playing. This week two of them are left. I know I'm going to watch the bloody game but I need to find a reason to do so. The rationalization process begins.

Well Essendon aka the Bombers, henceforth known as the Bummers are unbackable favourites. At least I wouldn't waste any money betting against them. Melbourne are the establishment club. All those MCC members. Their unbearable smugness is the unthinkable consequence of a Demons win.

OK, where does that leave me? The unthinkable versus the unpalatable. Which is which? Doesn't matter - they're interchangeable. Let's start with the Bummers. Lost one game all year. As I write this piece I am watching a replay of last week's game, and I see Matthew Lloyd (one of their "pretty boys"), getting an unjustified free kick. And it just confirms they're on their way to a thumping victory and are destined to sail their way into the big one. Definitely not the Bummers! Can't bear the thought of that.

All right then, it's got to be the Gutnicks by default. They haven't won a Grand Final since I was learning to use a dip pen at school. Last time they played in a GF it was the most lop-sided final ever. It was so boring that I struggle to remember it. So they're the underdogs, the rank outsiders, just there to make up the numbers. That should be enough to make the decision automatic. But the thought of all those power brokers lazing in their leather lounges sipping on their brandy balloons and nodding and winking to each other knowingly in the Melbourne Club starts things churning. Stomachs, mainly.

Since it is all too difficult, I'll take a look back over the season - after all, there's nothing like procrastination when it comes to the too hard basket. My team, the Swans, missed the end of season play-offs for the first time since '96. They started of f with an unexpected bang, winning their first three of their games. Then they fell into the bad habit of losing the close ones. They missed several games by two kicks, or less. Had they got up in any of them they would have been in the finals.

St Kilda were the under-achievers of the year. Fremantle jumped up the ladder a bit, perhaps not enough to make many see them as a threat, but up is better than down. Collingwood started with five wins on the trot and visions of this being the year glazed over the faithfuls' eyes once again. Then the rot set in. They never learn.

West Coast had their most miserable year in what seems like living memory. The once all conquering Wiggles looked too old, too slow. Port Adelaide's report card will read "Expected to do better." After making the final last year, they fell in a heap. Their neighbours, Adelaide, must look at their back-to-back premierships and wonder if it was all a dream. Richmond fulfilled what appears to be their destiny and finished ninth on percentages - yet again.

Geelong and Brisbane made the Eight and that was it. Hawthorn went better than most expected and stretched their season into the second week of the finals. North Melbourne, the Kangaroos, if you insist, failed in their quest to defend the title and get the coveted back-to-back record in their CV. Carlton sealed their own fate, losing to Melbourne in the first week of the finals and met their end at the hands of a ruthless Bummers onslaught and in the process robbed the pundits of their dream Grand final. Somewhere in there Footscray, who now want to be known as the Western Bulldogs, made the finals and failed to make the most of their chances - for the umpteenth year running.

So that left us with the Bummers and the Gutnicks and me with my dilemma. So I took another look into the too hard basket and went for the only option remaining. At least it will sustain my interest for a bit anyway. I can hope for a close one. And the Dees get up by a point. With a kick for goal after the siren. It's not asking too much is it?

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Issue 69 contents

Interview: Global Warrior
International unions have won a game of political football with soccer`s hierarchy - and Aussie Tim Noonan is behind the victory.

History: King of Broken Hill
John Shields recounts the colourful life of William Sydney 'Shorty' O'Neil (1903-2000) and his place in the rich history of a remarkable town.

International: History Repeats At Firestone
More than 8,000 workers, members of the United Steelworkers of America (USWA), are set to strike at nine Bridgestone/Firestone plants in the United States at midnight tonight.

Politics: The Past We Need To Understand
In his Vincent Lingiari Memorial Lecture Malcolm Fraser retraces the path of Australian race relations and laments the terrible impasse we've reached.

Unions: Economic Democracy
Sharan Burrow on making Working Australia's money talk and reforming corporate culture for the 21st Century.

Satire: Another windscreen washer joins millionaire list
SYDNEY, Monday: After just a year in his new job, John Samuels has added his name to the burgeoning list of enterprising Australians who have made their fortunes by offering partial car-washing facilities in convenient inner city road-side locations.

Review: No Long Term
Much political commentary is about the global marketplace and the use of new technologies as hallmarks of the new capitalism. Richard Sennett investigates another dimension of change: new ways of organising time, particularly working time.

» New Benchmark In Bank Greed

» Olympics Deal Sparks Soccer Ball Victory

» Two Day Strike Hits BHP Mines

» Leightons, SOCOG Tremble Before Haka

» Hilton Hotels Limp As Strike Bites

» Wran Lends Boffins A Hand

» ACTU Meets Joy

» Barracks Workers Put The Pinch On Local MP

» Olympic Win For Taxi Drivers

» Australian Unions Keep Spotlight on Fiji

» Staff Eye Telstra Prize

» Dice Loaded Against American Workers

» NZ Union Federations Heal Split

» Pressure Mounts On Nike To Live Olympic Ideal