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| Issue No 30 |  |
10 September 1999 |
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SatireTicketing Chaos!By The Chaser
Sydney Olympics to be held in Beijing
The decision to change the Olympic track and field program created further chaos today when it was revealed that certain events will have to change venue to accommodate the new schedule. People who have pre-purchased tickets may now see events substantially different from those they ordered tickets for. "I ordered tickets for Stadium Australia hoping to see the 400m finals, yesterday they changed it to the Javelin and today they relocated the High Diving there," said one disappointed fan. Several of Australia's Javelin throwers are also annoyed by the move. "I just can't get enough run up on the diving board," said one javelin champion. Cathy Freeman has also expressed concern about the number of times she has to come up for air in the new 400m venue. Residents of Bondi are also said to be concerned by the relocation of the 100m sprint to the Bondi Beach Volleyball stadium. SOCOG has so far ignored local residents claims that this may ruin the pristine untrampled wilderness of Bondi beach. SOCOG is however investigating claims that the relocation may ruin any chance of runners breaking any world records. The inevitable backlash from ticket purchasers has been ignored by SOCOG. A SOCOG press release pointed out that "The possibility of major changes in the ticketing was made clear to all purchasers. It was very clearly set out in the watermark on page 30 of the ordering form. Once it was translated back to English, everyone was made aware of this possible rescheduling and transferring of events." Not all spectators are against the changes. "I hate the way that you usually only get to see a few metres of the marathon. Now that its in the boxing ring every moment will be accessible to the whole crowd," said one thrilled Sydney sider. Meanwhile there are concerns that International Olympic Committee President Juan Antonio Samaranch may be pushing further changes of location. "If we hold the Syd-e-ney Olympics in Beijing there is still a chance that I may get the Nobel Peace prize," said Samaranch from the IOC headquarters.
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   Interview: The Seeds of GenocideBrian Daluz, from the Council for the National Resistance of Timor, believes Timorese are being herded into concentration camps. Unions: The Mice That RoaredHotel housekeeper Belinda Nicholls stole the show at the Second Wave rally with her story of the triumph of a group of newly-unionised workers. International: The Hand of God?John Passant asks whether Turkey�s Earthquake was a natural disaster or a criminal act. Republic: The Republic Debate: Should It Go Into Extra Time?In the battle of political - sporting analogies, a skeptic states his case. Legal: Call WaitingThe Federal Court has put a dampener on outsourcing within a corporate structure. Satire: Ticketing Chaos! Sydney Olympics to be held in Beijing Review: The Thirteenth FloorA new film challenges the boundaries between reality and �virtual� reality and explores some of the moral issues that these technologies will introduce. Labour Review: What's New at the Information CentreRead the latest issue of Labour Review, a resource for union officials and students.
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