
Issue No 3		05 March 1999

Piers Watch

Piers on the Mardi Gras - Does Size Really Matter?

By Madame Bouffant

Piers excelled himself in the last week with not one but two articles on the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras -- or as he describes it that "celebration of a peculiar sexual preference."

Or, as he decribes the gay and lesbian community, that 'tiny but powerful section of the community that opportunistically vilifies other sections of the community including clerics and nuns in the name of anti-discrimination.'

Que? Can someone please explain what this man is talking about.?

I assume he is referring to those tireless purveyors of good deeds the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. I have never ever heard a vilifying word escape the good sisters lips. They are the epitome of grace and distinction and they do not stoop to crass criticisms and expressions to get their point across.

Every year Piers seems obsessed with the length (oops sorry) size of the crowd watching the parade. In the Daily Telegraph he states: "As numerous mathematicians have calculated the length of the route and the depth of the crowd mandate that the most generous figure would probably be in the order of 150,000."

Have Piers and "numerous mathematicians" been getting together to mull over the average space taken up by a parade watcher multiplied by the length of Liverpool, Oxford and Crown Street multiplied by five for the depth of the crowd with a further 20 per cent added for all the people hanging off balconies, in shops, houses, awning and roofs?

In the Daily Telegraph column he accuses the police of being manipulated by the "lavender mafia" in the calculation of figures.

When challenging the police media unit on the figures he states they are a: "curious result given that careful calculations by smarter people could produce no more than one-third this number."

A word of warning Piers. Not a good idea to accuse the police of being less than smart particularly when it comes to counting. If he's not careful people will start to think he's obsessed with how many there are out there who are happy to line the streets for hours cheering on men and women who are brazenly flaunting their sexuality.

Why is this issue occupying so much of Piers valuable thinking time when there are so many other issues that we the reading public need his deep insight into?

Perhaps he will begin applying the saem analytical skills to the over-estimation of Rugby league crowds now that his employers have gutted the game.

From now on turnstiles should be set up at every street entrance, intersection, park entrance, doorway and every other possible point of entry to the parade route.

Police will be on stand-by at each point to check that there is no cheating so once and for all we can know who many people watch the parade. After all they have nothing better to do.

This will keep them off the streets harassing the drug addicts, dole-bludgers, drag-queens and want members of minority groups who a upstanding citizens would agree, should be kept in the closet.

Because Piers and I, and all the other 45 Sydneysiders who didn't watch the parade, just don't want to look at them.

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Issue 3 contents

Interview: How Organising Works
The ACTU�s Sarah Kaine is part of a new breed of union organiser who help workers stand up for themselves.

Unions: Big Boys Bank on Mergers
Mergers of the big banks are back on the agenda, and the Finance Sector Union is leading the community campaign against them.

History: Commemorating Our Dear Departed Equal Pay Activists
Two women who deserve special recognition and commemoration as part of our Women's Day celebrations are Eileen Powell and Edna Ryan, both of who played a crucial role in the struggle for equal pay.

Legal: New Judge Announces Zero Tolerance Of Pay Inequity In NSW
The NSW Industrial Relations Commission is training its sights on industrial raw-deals for women, and targeting the traditional under-valuation of women's work.

Review: Keep the Australia in Australian Television.
Local content quotas for Australian television are under threat from our Kiwi cousins.

Campaign Diary: Radical Conservatives Raise Their Own Bar
This Monday writs are issued for the state election, The phoney campaign ends and the real one begins; and the issue of stability, the need for it and the lack of it, is set to dominate the next four weeks.

» Unions Win Virtual Access To The Workplace

» Shaw To Snip At Gender Pay Gaps

» Living Wage - Round One To Unions

» Workers Fight Hotel Chain's Contracts Push

» No Picnic, No Pay

» The Modern Day Tales Of Robin Hood

» Nothing Casual About Woolies Drivers

» Unionists Flex Muscles for a Gay Time