||Issue No. 242||15 October 2004|
Interview: The Last Bastian
Unions: High and Dry
Security: Liquid Borders
Industrial: No Bully For You
History: Radical Brisbane
International: No Vacancies
Economics: Life After Capitalism
Technology: Cyber Winners
Poetry: Do It Yourself Poetry
Review: Hard Labo(u)r
The Locker Room
Invest in Dignity Part III
You Need Help
Whose Party Is It Anyway?
Post Election Tool
While Australian Chamber of Commerce and Industry boss Peter Hendy's reaction to the Federal election may not be the only political equivalent of premature ejaculation we saw this week, it was certainly one of the more impressive.
Poor old Peter let the cat out of the bag when he revealed his wish list following the return of Dear Leader Howard.
Hendy was foaming at the mouth this week on the need for radical workplace legislation blocked in the Senate over the past seven years to be passed.
The reforms include the old hoary chestnut of compulsory union secret ballots before strikes to stop those hairy Bolsheviks from intimidating the honest Australian yeomanry, more AWAs and small business exemption from unfair dismissals.
There is also the laughable call for a permanent commission to police corruption in the building industry. Obviously Hendy is keen to see his mates at the ACCI locked up for killing people.
Hendy also wants the Orwellian titled More Jobs Better Pay Bill passed.
Still, this advocate of paying people in salt shouldn't surprise us. Hendy first rose to mediocrity as a staffer for the man so fondly loved by Australians, Peter Reith. Was it Hendy that showed him how to use a phone card?
Hendy has a unique philosophical position that only members of the Liberal party should receive funds from the taxpayer - advocating that mothers and workers in industries such as sugar should be forced to stand on their own two feet.
Which is fair enough. We can all see how members of the ASX200 would struggle without the assistance of not only taxpayers dollars, but also the judicial, legislative and executive arms of the state to defend them from the rampant greed of Australians working 50-plus hours a week for $35,000 a year.
Luckily Peter Hendy has dedicated his life to ensuring that no Australian millionaire will ever live in poverty.
The Australian Chamber of Commerce and Industry (which is none of the above) is an interesting organisation, in much the same way that the Ebola Virus is an interesting medical development.
In his drive to reduce Australia to a third world nation populated by a grateful peasantry Hendy claims that there is no such thing as a bad job. No doubt shovelling asbestos is seen as 'enhanced employment mobility' by our Tool Of The Week.
Or maybe Hendy could lead the way by going and chipping cotton piecework in 50 degree heat for 40 dollars a day. Or maybe he'd prefer to work from home 16 hours a day as an outworker and have as much at the end of the week as his mates at the ACCI spend on a bottle of wine over lunch.
This is the sort of dribble we can expect from someone who's never done a day of real work in their lives to start with.
All of this subtlety does make sense if we understand Hendy's view that getting paid less to work longer is a good thing, the Kyoto protocols' are evil and that Hitler was really just a misunderstood genius
In Hendy's view his fellow Australians are little more than robots to be picked up and put down like a shovel, which is consistent with his view that people with more money are more worthy and better human beings.
No wonder the Howard government is proud to have the support of Hendy's glorious vision of a new Reich; soon our Tool Of The Week can start rounding up Bolsheviks, single mothers, trade unionists, Catholics and other free thinkers as soon as the camps are freed up.
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