||Issue No. 207||22 December 2003|
Backs to the Wall
Interview: Robbo’s Rules
Unions: Fightback 2003
Bad Boss: Madame Lash Whips Tony
Politics: United Front
Economics: Looking Back - Looking Forward
International: Net Benefits
History: The New Guard
Poetry: What is the PM singing this Christmas?
Review: Culture That Was
The Locker Room
Looking The Otherway At Christmas
HAIL TO THE TOOL
The most dangerous US President in living memory is often portrayed as a homespun, simple fellow. The grin. The vacant gaze. The vacuous and inappropriate comment.
Let's face it. The leader of the free world is an idiot.
Money can't buy you love, but it can buy you the US Presidency. The humourist Michael Moore has documented the steps that were taken to stuff a ballot box in Florida in 2001 in order to elect the idiot son of a failed former Republican leader. Thanks to his criminally insane brother (not the one who defrauded millions of their savings, the other one) George was able to pick up the Electoral College in Florida and assume the presidency.
Thanks to George we are now in an arms salesman's wet dream - a state of permanent and total war. We must abandon the very freedoms that we are defending in order to defend them.
Irony, and a hell of a lot of innocent kids, are now dead.
This is the man who, in the face of mounting poverty, decided to give tax cuts to some of the world's wealthiest people. This is the man who put Osama Bin Laden in the too hard basket. This is the man who has torn up the rules of global diplomacy and replaced it with a wild free for all. This is the man who has unilaterally assumed the mantle of world leader. This is the man who has taken a bunch of people that even the CIA thought were crazies and has placed them at the centre of state policy. This is the man who has cut welfare and health care while presiding over the biggest national budget defecit in human history.
The only thing crazier than this demented loon are the dangerous fools blindly following him, such as the Vodaphone Prime Minister.
This year George W. Bush has fought terror at home by grinning like an idiot while slashing overtime conditions and health care for millions of America's working poor.
To solve the conflicting demands in any society, and between nations, requires the skill of patience, it requires thoughtfulness, diplomacy and wisdom. Luckily George W. Bush has none of these.
Reflect on these remarkable contributions to the human gene pool:
"[T]he best way to find these terrorists who hide in holes is to get people coming forth to describe the location of the hole."
Washington, D.C., Dec. 15, 2003
"Security is the essential roadblock to achieving the road map to peace."
Washington, D.C., July 25, 2003
"I'm the master of low expectations."
Aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003
"First, let me make it very clear, poor people aren't necessarily killers. Just because you happen to be not rich doesn't mean you're willing to kill."
Washington, D.C., May 19, 2003
"I think war is a dangerous place."
Washington, D.C., May 7, 2003
The Hapsburg Empire collapsed because an inherited aristocracy became hopelessly inbred to the point of mental fatigue. In one generation the Bush line has managed to replicate the Hapsburg's 1400 years of evolutionary determinism to produce a chinless wonder with the intellect of a houseplant, and none of its aesthetic qualities.
Bush would be an unbelievable satire in the hands of, say, Peter Sellers or Charlie Chaplin. Scarily though, he's very real. Just as the conservatives in this country supported Hitler in the thirties, now, in the early part of the twenty-first century, they support Bush unquestioningly. After all, they share the same intellectual rigour.
Our Tool Of The Year George W. Bush should enjoy his time in the Tool Shed, as this time next year there will be a Democrat president-elect and Bush should be facing the International War Crimes tribunal in The Hague, charged for his Crimes Against Humanity.
Well, he should if there's any justice in this world.
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