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Issue No. 140 | 14 June 2002 |
Abbott's Rule of Law
Interview: Party Girl Unions: Touch One, Touch All Industrial: Condition Critical International: Innocence Lost History: Strange Bedfellows Organising: Just Say No Review: Choosing Life Beneath The Clouds Poetry: Did We Make a Big Mistake
Building Workers Gagged By Commission Combet Drives Car Industry Summit Green Ban Protects Aussie Timber Jobs Della Picks Up Manslaughter Baton Billions Of Reasons For Reasonable Hours Swans in Dark as Lights Go Out Workplace Wishes Walked All Over Campaign Steps Up To Stop Child Labor
The Soapbox The Dressing Room The Locker Room Week in Review Bosswatch
Due Credit Tom's Foolery More Latham More Tom
Labor Council of NSW |
The Locker Room The Other Les Murray
France has gone home from the World Cup without registering a win or scoring a goal, and the darky villain of the piece is the former Colony of Senegal. I thought the World Trade Organisation was set up to put a stop to these kinds of things. With player payments in Europe reaching sums that are usually associated with quantum physics it appears a shake out of the beautiful game in the Northern Hemisphere may be overdue. How much is Zidane worth again? Italy struggled after it selected its side from some retirement home, while that giant of world football, Slovenia, appeared to be there merely for the free tickets. Sepp Blatter, the man who makes Juan Antonio Samaranch look like some kind of free-thinking trotskyite, was fighting for his very survival in the lead up to this World Cup. At stake was the chance that an outsider may have been elected to be grand Pooh-Bah of the round ball game. This outsider was a black man, a concept that left European football with mouths agape in shock. Luckily the colonial order of things was maintained and Europe will continue to enjoy 15 of the 32 World Cup places on offer. This is important so that those dynamos of world football, like Belgium, Poland and Slovenia, can continue to strut their stuff on the world stage. Part of Comrade Blatter's support came from our humble region of the world, Oceania. This was on the back of a bribe to give Oceania a qualification position of it's own for the World Cup. I think this is a furphy, and not even a very good one at that.
Australia, qualifying on the back of those powerhouse footballing nations of Tonga and American Samoa may get the easy ride into the world Cup it's dreamed of, but is it merely a case of going from the ridiculously difficult to the sublimely ridiculous? If you hold up a map of the Eastern Hemisphere (east of what I hear you chuckle) you will notice that Australia has a remarkable proximity to this amazing concept called Asia. You must remember Asia. It was that thing that Keating kept going on about. Apparently it's why we got rid of him (I'm glad it had nothing at all to do with the fact that we spent the early nineties watching our living standards walk into a lift shaft). Anyway, why not change the habits of a decade and send a positive signal to our neighbours by going and having a kick with them in the lead-up to the World Cup? We can't be any more embarrassing than Saudi Arabia. I come to be pondering these mysteries as I continue to enjoy Les Murray's rolling vernacular during the rather fanatical and impressive presentation of the world game on SBS over recent weeks. My only concern is that I can't for the life of me place Les Murray's accent. It's a sort of Northern European/Mediterranean/husky Australian drawl. Maybe Les is the first truly multicultural presence in this country? I'd ask our great leader, Johnny Howard, but he will think I'm talking about the drop kick poet from Taree - and besides, my Vodaphone doesn't get reception up George Bush's arsehole, which apparently is where our great leader has been for the last week. So any suggestions on the origins of Les Murray's accent would be gratefully received. Send your suggestions to mailto:[email protected] The great thing about the World Cup is that it has provided a fantastic distraction from the ruling class with a racket in their hand, namely Wimbledon. No doubt we are set for that clown who carries on like some coke addled loon, Lleyton Hewitt, being more brat-like than was perceived possible. The resulting backlash will be dismissed as so much tall poppy syndrome. There's a reason why Australia has the tall poppy syndrome - it's to stop us being a nation of wankers. Sadly, it may be failing in that endeavour. Phil Doyle - disputing the line umpires call.
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