|
Issue No. 137 | 24 May 2002 |
An Aussie Icon
Interview: Just Done It? Tribute: Lest We Forget History: Solidarity Forever Technology: Unblocking the Superhighway International: Gloves Off Unions: Out Of Work Review: Strange Business Poetry: The Lawyer's Lament Satire: Government Mourns Loss Of Last Anzac
Retailers in Outworker Spotlight Syd in Vicious Backpacker Stand-off Microsoft Monopoly Under Challenge Kiddies Not Exactly Having a Ball NSW ALP Faces Asylum Seeker Test Canberra Acts on Industrial Manslaughter Santa Claus Strikers on Christmas Island Abbott Believes Management Should Dictate Low Paid Not To Blame For Beer Price Rise Casino Award Covers Eastern States Security Workers Want Bosses Sacked Sydneysiders Rally For Western Sahara
The Soapbox The Locker Room Bosswatch Postcard Week in Review
Your Tools Page is Down Big Dave Foster Give Us a Click! Will the Real Mark Latham Please Stand Up? Unified Labour The Last Survivor Not Hate Mail
Labor Council of NSW |
Satire Government Mourns Loss Of Last AnzacExtracted from The Chaser
"It's an extraordinary loss," sobbed Costello. "A $6.20 loss to us per drug prescription, to be precise." The Treasury Department, who have worked for five years squeezing Australia's elderly and disabled to the point that the Government makes profits from them, held a minute's silence to commemorate the 28% hike in pharmaceutical benefits they would have enjoyed had Campbell managed to hang on a few more years. Several Treasury hacks are said to have shed tears when they recalled the copious amounts of asthma medication they were denied exploiting because of his death. They then honoured a humble memorial for the extra $188 per fortnight they would have reaped when the Budget successfully downgraded Campbell from the ex-servicemen's pension to the Newstart allowance. "But it's so much more than simply fiscals," said Costello. "It's the long-established Aussie tradition of mean-spirited Treasurers ripping off the less fortunate that has died a little death today. But we will remember." Costello presented a short but respectful tribute to Campbell, drawing attention to his long years of service for his country, concluding, "It's a shame that such a glorious Australian would have given up the fight in his country's hour of need, just when we could have profited most from him."
|
Search All Issues | Latest Issue | Previous Issues | Print Latest Issue |
© 1999-2002 Workers Online |
|